Countless times we have heard and said, “It’s all for Your glory, Lord – it’s all about You.” But when the “rubber meets the road,” do we really want Him to be known or our name to be recognized? We offer our lives up to God, saying, “Wherever You send me I will go.” Yet we second-guess His call if it doesn’t fit with our plan or agenda.
These two things have definitely challenged me on this trip. I thought I was in it completely for His glory, completely open to what He would have me do… until He had me do nothing. Don’t take me wrong, I haven’t been bored by any means. But as I look forward to future involvement in the ministry here, I became overly focused on “my role.” I wanted to report back, “This is what I did.” Recognition. But I felt unproductive, questioning, “How could God even use me here?”
What I had forgotten, though, is that His plan is infinitely bigger than me having a sense of fulfillment or thinking I did something really great. His plan is to bring people to Himself from every people group, bringing ultimate glory to Himself. I can either join with that, saying “What would you have me do?” or make my own plans for ministry then “check in” with Him to see if it’s okay.
For now, I come simply as a learner. There is much to learn about ministry, language, and culture. I am open to whatever God has to speak.
I am so thrilled to be here. I have a greater sense of the ministry that’s happening here and am even more excited about future involvement. And if the question arises, “Did you feel like involvement in the ministry in Colombia was the fulfillment of your life?” I can easily say no… for one thing, I am fulfilled in Christ alone, walking wherever He leads me. And for another thing, regardless of my feeling, I’m more confident than ever that He has called me to the work here and I won’t let those feelings get in the way of that work.